God loves me!
I am not used to the emotional rollercoaster that is graduation. I was doing fine for a few days, but once life calmed down a bit and I was feeling alright with letting life happen when it happens, and I started freaking out again. I feel like I'm 12 years old again and I don't know if I'm going to be laughing or crying at any moment.
Tonight was spent worrying about the future, the fact that I don't have a job, and that I only have 2 1/2 months left until "Go time". I came home from an evening of praying and reading my scriptures looking for some kind of resolution and my roommate Lis was sitting on the couch. We sat and talked for a while. She mentioned that sometimes when our faith is tested, it's only a little while before the Lord sends the blessings we need. Alot of times they aren't the blessings we are looking for, but they are definitely blessings.
I came back to my room to work on my paper, and check my e-mail. The only thing in my inbox was the monthly newsletter from my department at school, which I rarely read, and only briefly check out the employment section. Usually the jobs available are part time contracting work, which I would love to get involoved with once I start having kids and settling down. However, these jobs are supplemental in nature and are not meant to be a sole income.
Well, as I checked it today, there were a few jobs listed looking for full time genealogists, specifically genealogists working towards Acreditation, and who already have a degree in Genealogy. One of the companies is a molecular genealogy firm, they are working on a database of DNA samples and linking those people into pedigree charts using DNA and records. They are looking for people with my degree, and I would be able to stay in the area. There are a few more, and I will be sending out my resume as soon as I refine it a little more.
All this job talk got me excited, and I checked my job sites that I haven't looked at in about a week and half, and there are alot of exciting prospects on that website as well. It was just another way that I saw today that the Lord loves me and is going to help me get where I need to be, just so long as I keep close to Him, and I keep working on my faith.
In other news I have a new roommate. She showed up on my doorstep yesterday. I'm a little nervous because she is a brandspanking new freshnam. She graduated from highschool last Saturday and is from a very small town. So far she's been in her room quite a bit, and hasn't really come out to meet Lis and me, but I'll keep you informed of how it goes.
Have a fantastic day!!
Tuesday, May 30, 2006
Saturday, May 27, 2006
On the upside
Well, I'm back, and life is still life, but it doesn't seem nearly as overwhelming as it has in the past. Thanks for all your prayers and support, they mean more than you know.
I don't have any funny stories or anything, but I've been thinking a lot about Memorial Day this weekend. Maybe it's because I am working for a genealogy company and so Memorial Day is a pretty big deal (I've had three e-mails about it in less than 24 hours). I've had three grandparents pass away, the one that I've been thinking of the most is my Grandpa Joe, my mom's dad. Grandpa passed away a few years before I was born, and the only way I've ever really known him is by the stories my parents and uncles tell about him.
The first time I remember hearing about him was when I taught myself how to whistle when I was about 3 or 4. My mom sat me down and told me about how Grandpa would whistle everywhere he went. The stories kept adding up, how he dipped his bananas in sugar, was the world's picky-est eater, how he would take the steps two at a time, and the way he cared for his children and his wife. My mom always told me that she thought he must have sent me to her and my dad. One aspect of this was that I was a right holy terror when I was really young, and Grandpa would have thought it was a good laugh, another aspect of this is that mom said I reminded her of him in many ways.
This has always made me wonder about the day when I will get to meet him. The closest I have ever come is when I was working on a paper for one of my genealogy classes and had a chance to listen to an oral history Grandpa made in 1978. It was one of the best experiences of my life. I got to hear my grandfather tell the story of his life, growing up a well-mannered-tennis-playing-garage-deconstructing-hyperactive-boy, falling in love with my grandmother (he was totally smitten, he proposed everyday for 3 months until she said yes, mostly to see what his reaction would be, he wanted to be married right away, but Grandma's mother thought she was too young to marry), and then the experiences he had as he became a father, lost children prematurely, and found his faith.
There are so many more thoughts I have about this wonderful man, but I don't have the time or space to share them all.
What are your favorite memories of your family?
I don't have any funny stories or anything, but I've been thinking a lot about Memorial Day this weekend. Maybe it's because I am working for a genealogy company and so Memorial Day is a pretty big deal (I've had three e-mails about it in less than 24 hours). I've had three grandparents pass away, the one that I've been thinking of the most is my Grandpa Joe, my mom's dad. Grandpa passed away a few years before I was born, and the only way I've ever really known him is by the stories my parents and uncles tell about him.
The first time I remember hearing about him was when I taught myself how to whistle when I was about 3 or 4. My mom sat me down and told me about how Grandpa would whistle everywhere he went. The stories kept adding up, how he dipped his bananas in sugar, was the world's picky-est eater, how he would take the steps two at a time, and the way he cared for his children and his wife. My mom always told me that she thought he must have sent me to her and my dad. One aspect of this was that I was a right holy terror when I was really young, and Grandpa would have thought it was a good laugh, another aspect of this is that mom said I reminded her of him in many ways.
This has always made me wonder about the day when I will get to meet him. The closest I have ever come is when I was working on a paper for one of my genealogy classes and had a chance to listen to an oral history Grandpa made in 1978. It was one of the best experiences of my life. I got to hear my grandfather tell the story of his life, growing up a well-mannered-tennis-playing-garage-deconstructing-hyperactive-boy, falling in love with my grandmother (he was totally smitten, he proposed everyday for 3 months until she said yes, mostly to see what his reaction would be, he wanted to be married right away, but Grandma's mother thought she was too young to marry), and then the experiences he had as he became a father, lost children prematurely, and found his faith.
There are so many more thoughts I have about this wonderful man, but I don't have the time or space to share them all.
What are your favorite memories of your family?
Tuesday, May 23, 2006
Swinging
There is a saying my mother taught me when I was younger.
"When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot and Swing!!"
Well, It's not that I've been doing any swinging, but I've been feeling the need lately. Graduation is looming ever closer. I'm starting to realize what people mean when they say I have no idea about what the "real world" is. I've been desparately trying to do homework, and work, and still keep my head above water. I have to admit, I'm having a pretty hard time.
It seems like no matter what I do it just keeps adding up. The papers, reading, figuring out finances, insurance, and all the million other things when I don't have a job lined up after graduation. It's just really frustrating, and maybe it's because people have moved out, and my mom and dad aren't here, but more than anything it just feels lonely. My older sisters graduated from college together and moved into a house with their best friend. They had each other when they were faced with the black wall of graduation. At this point I am leaning towards staying where I am because I think the job field for my degree might be better than down in Texas, but I'm just so frustrated with not knowing.
It's times like this when I wish I knew my future husband. And it's not that I'm out actively looking for a husband right now (heck, I don't even have time for laundry!), but I just think it would be nice to have that partnership, someone in it for the long haul. Someone to hold me when I need to be held, to help make dinner and do the dishes afterward, someone who looks into my eyes and wonders what he did to be so blessed. Someone for me to serve and love, and to look at them and wonder why I have been so blessed. My faith is the most important thing in my life and I know that the family is central to our Heavenly Father's plan for us. And I know that marriage and family takes alot of work, but it also takes and returns a lot of love.
My parents and siblings are all wonderful examples to me of love and respect and service in marriages. I watch them all working in partnership with one another and with the Lord to make their homes safe havens, where love wins out, and everyone works for the better of the family. My parents have been married for over 30 years. When we would catch Mom and Dad kissing in the kitchen, we would run from the room screaming, and Dad would so lovingly remind us that the best gift a father can give his children is to show them that he loves their mother. I have four siblings. All of them are now married, and starting families of their own. It's not that I feel left out of the family, because all of my siblings, and my in-laws are so aware of me, and my feelings, and I know that I am so lucky to be loved by so many people.
Don't worry, it's not like I am going to rush into something that is not right. I know that when the time comes to make that decision, it will be made with a lot of prayer, and trust that the Lord will let me know that I am on the right track. I am just excited, and a little impatient for the day when I can pledge my heart and soul to the man who will love me forever.
I know that the Lord will help me in the coming months, and years, and will help to ease this uncertain time. Sorry if this had seemed like a depressing post, but I just needed to express some things. Putting it all into words has already helped more than you know.
"When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot and Swing!!"
Well, It's not that I've been doing any swinging, but I've been feeling the need lately. Graduation is looming ever closer. I'm starting to realize what people mean when they say I have no idea about what the "real world" is. I've been desparately trying to do homework, and work, and still keep my head above water. I have to admit, I'm having a pretty hard time.
It seems like no matter what I do it just keeps adding up. The papers, reading, figuring out finances, insurance, and all the million other things when I don't have a job lined up after graduation. It's just really frustrating, and maybe it's because people have moved out, and my mom and dad aren't here, but more than anything it just feels lonely. My older sisters graduated from college together and moved into a house with their best friend. They had each other when they were faced with the black wall of graduation. At this point I am leaning towards staying where I am because I think the job field for my degree might be better than down in Texas, but I'm just so frustrated with not knowing.
It's times like this when I wish I knew my future husband. And it's not that I'm out actively looking for a husband right now (heck, I don't even have time for laundry!), but I just think it would be nice to have that partnership, someone in it for the long haul. Someone to hold me when I need to be held, to help make dinner and do the dishes afterward, someone who looks into my eyes and wonders what he did to be so blessed. Someone for me to serve and love, and to look at them and wonder why I have been so blessed. My faith is the most important thing in my life and I know that the family is central to our Heavenly Father's plan for us. And I know that marriage and family takes alot of work, but it also takes and returns a lot of love.
My parents and siblings are all wonderful examples to me of love and respect and service in marriages. I watch them all working in partnership with one another and with the Lord to make their homes safe havens, where love wins out, and everyone works for the better of the family. My parents have been married for over 30 years. When we would catch Mom and Dad kissing in the kitchen, we would run from the room screaming, and Dad would so lovingly remind us that the best gift a father can give his children is to show them that he loves their mother. I have four siblings. All of them are now married, and starting families of their own. It's not that I feel left out of the family, because all of my siblings, and my in-laws are so aware of me, and my feelings, and I know that I am so lucky to be loved by so many people.
Don't worry, it's not like I am going to rush into something that is not right. I know that when the time comes to make that decision, it will be made with a lot of prayer, and trust that the Lord will let me know that I am on the right track. I am just excited, and a little impatient for the day when I can pledge my heart and soul to the man who will love me forever.
I know that the Lord will help me in the coming months, and years, and will help to ease this uncertain time. Sorry if this had seemed like a depressing post, but I just needed to express some things. Putting it all into words has already helped more than you know.
Monday, May 15, 2006
Make New Friends But Keep the Old
This summer term has been full of friends moving out and moving in. First to leave was my roomate and friend Kerry.
Kerry is amazing. She is completely loving and selfless. During the move that nearly cost me my blogging habit, We were all tired, we had just finished killing our selves with finals, and Kerry came down with a really bad cold the night before the move. Finally, on Friday morning when I wasn't sure if I would be done with cleaning before check out, Kerry got on her hands and knees and helped me scrub the kitchen floor. Kerry is fantastic, she's gone out of state for the summer, and I miss her like crazy.
Another good friend I will be missing is my dear friend Agis. He went home last week. We've called him several times, but it doesn't make it any easier to think that he is going to be gone for two years. We wanted to do something special to show him that we love him, so for his birthday we made a cardboard cut out of his head and took pictures. We threw a birthday party for him,
then things got a little crazy.
And finally, my roommate Elle Scorcho has decided to go home for the next two months. She is practically family, (she's planning to come to the family reunion in 4 years). I came home tonight and suddenly the apartment felt so incredibly empty. Life will go on, and I keep telling myself she will be back in a few months. Until then I will just have to talk to her almost constantly, and take lots of pictures while she is gone. This pic is from our totally awesome Cinco de Mayo party.
Basically we went and ate Mexican food. Then we came home and watched a movie. Not super festive, but good all the same.
On the bright side, I got a chance to meet Agis' older brother, Shayster, who just moved out here to go to school. I met him yesterday. So far, he's a pretty cool cat.
That's about all the news for now. I'll keep you posted on the sparsness of my friends and my new budding social life.
Kerry is amazing. She is completely loving and selfless. During the move that nearly cost me my blogging habit, We were all tired, we had just finished killing our selves with finals, and Kerry came down with a really bad cold the night before the move. Finally, on Friday morning when I wasn't sure if I would be done with cleaning before check out, Kerry got on her hands and knees and helped me scrub the kitchen floor. Kerry is fantastic, she's gone out of state for the summer, and I miss her like crazy.
Another good friend I will be missing is my dear friend Agis. He went home last week. We've called him several times, but it doesn't make it any easier to think that he is going to be gone for two years. We wanted to do something special to show him that we love him, so for his birthday we made a cardboard cut out of his head and took pictures. We threw a birthday party for him,
then things got a little crazy.
And finally, my roommate Elle Scorcho has decided to go home for the next two months. She is practically family, (she's planning to come to the family reunion in 4 years). I came home tonight and suddenly the apartment felt so incredibly empty. Life will go on, and I keep telling myself she will be back in a few months. Until then I will just have to talk to her almost constantly, and take lots of pictures while she is gone. This pic is from our totally awesome Cinco de Mayo party.
Basically we went and ate Mexican food. Then we came home and watched a movie. Not super festive, but good all the same.
On the bright side, I got a chance to meet Agis' older brother, Shayster, who just moved out here to go to school. I met him yesterday. So far, he's a pretty cool cat.
That's about all the news for now. I'll keep you posted on the sparsness of my friends and my new budding social life.
Friday, May 12, 2006
The Flip Flop Mamma tagged me, so here goes:
The "I" List...
I want my whole family to live in one place.
I wish I could travel the whole world, and change someone's life for the better.
I hate people who are purposefully hurtful.
I am a little neurotic.
I miss my family, and Gelati's from Rita's "Wooder" Ice I hear my roommate screaming because I just hid the giant Legolas Cut Out in the shower again.
I wonder what I will end up doing in my life.
I can't see a chubby baby without wanting to zurb their tummies (when you lift up their shirt and blow on their stomach. Thanks to The Cosby Show for the technical name and to Papa for teaching the Tummy Gummer's poem by Mason Williams)
I regret not calling my Grandma more often.
I am not the most tactful person in the world. My bluntness has tapered off since highschool, but sometimes I still blurt things out when I should bite my tongue.
I sing loudly in the car, with my windows down.
I dance like a maniac. People think I know what I'm doing, but it's all just pretending.
I cry when I read my dad's blog, and during chick flicks. (Strangely enough 13 Going on 30 gets me everytime. There is one part where Jenna Rink's world is falling apart, and she climbs into bed with her mom in the middle of the night. I saw this movie for the first time when my world was falling apart, and there had been times when I curled up in bed with my mom. About my dad's blog, My mom has told me that I am alot like my dad, so sometimes he writes about things that may not seem to be super important, but they mean alot to me. That's my horn, my hopechest, and everything in the lavender room).I do my happy dance when things are going really well.
I would like to learn how to fix my car.
I make fish faces when I'm bored.
I am secretly shy about asking for help from people I don't know.
I write anonymous love notes and send them in the mail. Everyone like to get something nice to read sometimes.
I confuse the names of my sister and my niece.
I know that God loves me, and that prayer helps everything!
I should spend more time exercising.
I start panicing when I think of life after Graduation.
I'm going to tag anyone who reads this and thinks they can give me something entertaining to read.
The "I" List...
I want my whole family to live in one place.
I wish I could travel the whole world, and change someone's life for the better.
I hate people who are purposefully hurtful.
I am a little neurotic.
I miss my family, and Gelati's from Rita's "Wooder" Ice I hear my roommate screaming because I just hid the giant Legolas Cut Out in the shower again.
I wonder what I will end up doing in my life.
I can't see a chubby baby without wanting to zurb their tummies (when you lift up their shirt and blow on their stomach. Thanks to The Cosby Show for the technical name and to Papa for teaching the Tummy Gummer's poem by Mason Williams)
I regret not calling my Grandma more often.
I am not the most tactful person in the world. My bluntness has tapered off since highschool, but sometimes I still blurt things out when I should bite my tongue.
I sing loudly in the car, with my windows down.
I dance like a maniac. People think I know what I'm doing, but it's all just pretending.
I cry when I read my dad's blog, and during chick flicks. (Strangely enough 13 Going on 30 gets me everytime. There is one part where Jenna Rink's world is falling apart, and she climbs into bed with her mom in the middle of the night. I saw this movie for the first time when my world was falling apart, and there had been times when I curled up in bed with my mom. About my dad's blog, My mom has told me that I am alot like my dad, so sometimes he writes about things that may not seem to be super important, but they mean alot to me. That's my horn, my hopechest, and everything in the lavender room).I do my happy dance when things are going really well.
I would like to learn how to fix my car.
I make fish faces when I'm bored.
I am secretly shy about asking for help from people I don't know.
I write anonymous love notes and send them in the mail. Everyone like to get something nice to read sometimes.
I confuse the names of my sister and my niece.
I know that God loves me, and that prayer helps everything!
I should spend more time exercising.
I start panicing when I think of life after Graduation.
I'm going to tag anyone who reads this and thinks they can give me something entertaining to read.
I'm not dead yet!
Sorry I've been gone so long. The end of April brought a flurry of finals and a big weekend of moving. I've been in my new apartment for almost 2 weeks at this point and it's about time I got back into the habit. Here's what's been going on:
1. The move. We were told by our landlord that since we were switching apartments, but staying in the same complex we would need to have everything out of our old apartment by noon. We thought that this meant we would be able to start moving our things into our new apartment by about 12:30. the problem was that the girls who were in our new apartment didn't get out until about 3:30. Moving was a little nuts and I have come to the following conclusions:
- I hate moving.
- I want to marry the person who crafted this fine piece of hardware:
It may not look like much and it may not be fancy, but it gave me the best shower I have ever had in my life. Some people may argue that The shower merely seemed better because I was so tired and hot and sweaty after moving, but seriously, this is an amazing piece of Chrome.
In other news, Grades came out for last semester and I was really pleased. There was one big surprise when I managed to pull off a B+ in a class I was afraid I would have to retake
My new job is fantastic.
Old friends have moved away for the summer, but new friends are being made all the time. My new Apartment is alot more central to the complex, and my social life has increased exponentially. Hooray!
I'll post again in a day or two, I promise it won't be another 3 weeks again.
Be Happy!!
1. The move. We were told by our landlord that since we were switching apartments, but staying in the same complex we would need to have everything out of our old apartment by noon. We thought that this meant we would be able to start moving our things into our new apartment by about 12:30. the problem was that the girls who were in our new apartment didn't get out until about 3:30. Moving was a little nuts and I have come to the following conclusions:
- I hate moving.
- I want to marry the person who crafted this fine piece of hardware:
It may not look like much and it may not be fancy, but it gave me the best shower I have ever had in my life. Some people may argue that The shower merely seemed better because I was so tired and hot and sweaty after moving, but seriously, this is an amazing piece of Chrome.
In other news, Grades came out for last semester and I was really pleased. There was one big surprise when I managed to pull off a B+ in a class I was afraid I would have to retake
My new job is fantastic.
Old friends have moved away for the summer, but new friends are being made all the time. My new Apartment is alot more central to the complex, and my social life has increased exponentially. Hooray!
I'll post again in a day or two, I promise it won't be another 3 weeks again.
Be Happy!!
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